Hi,
You are close, the configuration I used was:
BALENA_HOST_CONFIG_dtparam = "i2c_arm=off","spi=on","audio=on","i2c-gpio=on"
BALENA_HOST_CONFIG_dtoverlay = "vc4-fkms-v3d","i2c-gpio,i2c_gpio_sda=2,i2c_gpio_scl=3"
which boils down to:
dtparam=i2c_arm=off
dtparam=i2c-gpio=on
dtoverlay=i2c-gpio,i2c_gpio_sda=2,i2c_gpio_scl=3
to enable it.